Ask The MoThErFuCkIn Homestucks
by maybesadist131
Summary: (Rating bumped up cause of language. The first chapter will not be like the rest, so it's only second person for 1 chapter.) Your name is Catari Sinist and you LOVE a webcomic called HOMESTUCK. So when the troll kids and humans flash into your room(courtsey of a loving gift from a friend) you have to take the chance to make an ask fanfiction! So ask the Homestucks anything


**A/N: I said I wouldn't make a Homestuck fanfiction or tumblr first, but what's my first tumblr? A Homestuck fic? GASP! Well shit for you, I don't care. And, please note that if anyone is out of character (OOC), these are all based off a Chatzy roleplay-chat (Homestuck Fanatics). We kinda need a few more characters though, and, to be specific, we need a Jade, Jane, Equius, Eridan, Feferi, Gamzee, Tavros, Vriska, Aradia, and maybe a Karkat. Other than that we have all we need! PM me (Or something like that)with questions please. Also, PM if you're interested in a spot. Anyways, let me stop boring you and get THIS PARTY I mean story STARTED! (this was beta-d by my awesome friend :33)**

*DISCLAIMER*: I am a thirteen year old girl making an Ask The Homestucks fanfic. Does it SEEM like I own Homestuck? No? I thought so. I don't own Homestuck, dammit. :I

In a smallish house sat a girl staring at her laptop screen in boredom, the pale monitor light reflecting in her eyes. She groaned before flopping onto her back hopelessly. Yeah, she's that bored. Why don't we give this poor girl a name?

[A] == Enter Name.

Whiny Brattybitch

She refuses that name, additionally giving you an incredulous look. She is NOT a whiny bratty bitch, _thankyouverymuch._

Catari Sinist

She nods in acceptance.

[A] == Be Catari

Your name is CATARI SINIST, and you are SIX ALTERNIAN SWEEPS OLD. Haha, sorry. You tend to think like that accidentally, courtesy of your love of a WEBCOMIC called HOMESTUCK. You're actually just a THIRTEEN EARTH YEAR OLD, HUMAN GIRL. And to be honest, you are TERRIBLY BORED! You would remind youself of your varying INTERESTS but, why the hell would you? That would be very stupid! You were on Pesterchum a few seconds a go. No one was on at the moment. Unfairness is the fate you were apparently given today.

You look at a small wooden stick on your bedside table. It was a gift from a friend of yours. "IIt'll make all your wwii2he2 come true, hehehehe." she had told you in her weird text quirk thing. Poor her, having two totally redonkulous accents.

Heehee, she's always making you giggle. You reach for the stick; it's barely bigger than your hand… like a miniature wand! you wave it around and chant your wish, "I wish my favourite Homestuck characters would show up and stay here a while!" It, of course, doesn't work. Stupid fake wands, you want to kick Araina for tricking you so. You look it over and find a cute little star at the bottom part. You push it.

The end of the wand lights up. Your eyes widen for a moment. You swish it around, repeating your wish.

Suddenly, your room flashes white and you're temporarily blinded. As you are rubbing your eyes, you hear a few newly arrived voices.

"WHERE THE EVER-LOVING FUCK ARE WE?" You hear an angered, irritated voice ask. Wait a second—- Karkat? As in, KARKAT VANTAS? Holy shit!

"KK, calm your titth," Says a nasal, lisp-filled voice. Oh your god oh your god Sollux Captor OH YOUR FUCKING GOOOOD.

"DON'T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN, CAPTOR. WE SUDDENLY POOF THE FUCK IN A RANDOM ROOM—IN WHICH SEEMS TO BE A HUMAN ROOM—AND YOU'RE TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN? YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK YOU." Holy motherfucking shit he said Captor holy shit holy shit holy shit. You are freaking out as of this moment.

"Karkat, yelling won't do any good." She said Karkat. You want to jump up and down but you don't because you're thirteen and thirteen year old girls don't do that. At least, you don't think they do.

"Yes, I agree with Rose."

"Yeah, Karkitty! It doesn't really seem that bad, AC says as she examines the room!"

"I actually like how this room looks!" Proclaims a high-pitched but definitely male voice. John, you know it.

"Of course you do, Egderp, blue is obviously your favourite colour." Pfft. Egderp. Totally Dave, you think.

"Hehehehe, it tastes like blueberries!"

"OH MY GOD, QUIT LICKING THE FUCKING WALLS, TEREZI! UGH, GROSS."

Wait, what?

"Uh, anyone wondering who the girl is?"

It seems they've seen you. Or at least, Tavros has. You're still kind of freaking out.

"No one cares, Pupa!"

SPIDERBITCH. IT HAS TO BE, YOU THINK.

"Aww, don't listen to her, Tavrbro. Honk!"

"Well egads, how the bloody hell did we get here?"

"W-well, is anyone goin a find out w-where the fuck are w-we?"

"Will someone please quit this foolishness?"

"Well, this is really fishy!" Says an emotional voice. Is there a pun in that sentence, you silently ask yourself?

"Will anyone please inform me of who this girl may be?" OH GOSH IT'S THE RUSTBLOODED TROLL THAT IS YOUR PATRON TROLL.

"Haha, I have no idea. Anyone have any idea?" You're pretty sure this is John again.

You blink your eyes, which have finally adjusted, and see the Homestuck trolls and humans.

[A] == Catari: Resist the urge to squeal and glomp them.

You fail to resist the urge. Big time. Hence you squeal and glomp Karkat, (what? You love that nubby-horned troll the most) causing a whole lot of yelling. You jump up and introduce yourself.

"Tyraina Sinista's the name! And you're all here until I say you can leave!" You shout, your legs parted, one hand on your hip and the other pointing towards the crowd. You ignore their protest and sit in your swivel chair and think, why not start and ask Tumblr for these guys? Oh the fun you'll have!

[A] == Catari: Wonder why the whole cast is here.

Why would you do that? You love all the characters in Homestuck, well, unless you count Bec Noir and the general bad guys. Sons of bitches, you think. You wanted the Homestuck trolls and kids, and they appeared. Oh, you should call up your weird accented friend!

[A] == Catari: Call up your accented friend and close the story.

You were gonna do that anyways but okay!


End file.
